Dave and Wendy Sharfman were on their first trip to Israel and stopped into Udi’s Excellent Falafel House for lunch. The Sharfmans were reading the menu over the counter and then noticed a sign to the side that stated “Picture Menu Available”.
Dave thought that this was interesting so he asked Udi what it was.
“It’s for customers, maybe who have eye problems and they can’t read the menu.
“So how would your customers know this picture menu was available if they can’t read?” Dave asked.
“Well,” responded Udi, “It says so on the sign, doesn’t it?”
Chaim Yankel Epstein was a happy fellow but unfortunately grossly overweight. Concerned for his well-being his co-workers forced him to go on a diet.
For three weeks, Chaim Yankel resisted temptation, even changing his route to work to avoid his favorite bakery – Isaac’s Bakery.
But then one day, to the horror of his workmates, Chaim Yankel turned up at the office clutching a massive chocolate cake.
When his colleagues berated him, Chaim Yankel was quick to offer an explanation.
“I accidentally drove by Isaac’s Bakery this morning and there were so many tasty treats in the window. I thought it was basherte, that I was supposed to eat something, so I davened to Hashem, saying: “If you want me to have one of those delicious chocolate cakes, show me a sign – let there be a parking space directly in front of the bakery. And sure enough, the eighth time around the block, there it was!”
Dr. David Weinstein decided to move his practice from the city to the country because he liked the slower pace of life and the down to earth nature of the locals. He particularly liked the unique perspective of some of the local farmers. One day, Dr. Weinstein dropped in on old farmer Higgins. They got to talking about politics.
Farmer Higgins said, “Well, ya know, that candidate is a ‘Post Turtle’.”
Not being familiar with the term, Dr. Weinstein asked him what a ‘post turtle’ was.
Farmer Higgins said, “When you’re driving down a country road you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that’s a ‘post turtle’.”
Farmer Higgins saw the puzzled look on the doctor’s face so he continued to explain.
“You know they didn’t get up there by themselves, they don’t belong up there, they don’t know what to do while they’re up there, and you just wonder what kind of dummy put them up there to begin with.”