They say that in Israel everyone is a potential “shadchan” – a matchmaker. Smadar, a waitress at a local Jerusalem restaurant was no different. One day, she wanted to put her matchmaking skills to the test with one of her regular customers, a man named Itzik. She figured that Shlomit, another customer who seemed to have much in common with Itzik, would be an ideal match.
One day Itzik came into the restaurant when Shlomit was also there. Smadar dragged Itzik over to Shlomit ‘s table and introduced the two. Then she watched in amazement as Itzik put his arm around the Shlomit and said in his best mock-seductive voice, “Hellooooh, Shlomit .”
“You guys know each other?” Smadar asked.
“We sure do,” said Itzik. “She’s my sister.”
***
Aryeh and Devora, a young religious couple, were expecting their first baby. Devora went into labor on shabbos so they had no choice but to call for a taxi to take them to the hospital. Because Aryeh wanted to minimize the shabbos violation, he told the controller that he cannot have a Jewish driver.
The taxi quickly arrived, but when Aryeh and Devora were getting in, they overheard the controller on the two way radio ask the driver, “Have you picked up the anti-Semites yet?”
***
Shmulik Hadari was suffering from a bad case of the flu, so he called his doctor in Tel Aviv to get an appointment.
When he was told the scheduled date of the appointment, he became outraged and bellowed, “Three weeks? The doctor can’t see me for three weeks? I could well be dead by then!”
Calmly, the receptionist replied, “If so, would you have your wife call to cancel the appointment?”